July/2004: Media - Late last year, I received an email from a producer at Al Roker Productions about what we do at PeeJ. Immediately, I said "Al Roker has a production company?" before finding the website for his company, and what sorts of shows they do. I had only known Al Roker as "America's weatherman" or by his hilarious one-shot cameo on the TV Guide edition of Seinfeld, where he sees Elaine reading an Al Roker TV Guide, and then hits on her. So when I was asked if I'd interview with Al for the documentary they were in the beginning stages of planning, I said yes, of course. Not only to get the message of the site out, but hey, I actually wanted to meet Al Roker too.

To be completely honest, I never would have wanted to meet Al Roker if he didn't own the production company. Sure, he was a celebrity, but I'm not into celebrity by itself. There has to be something more. The fact that Roker produces hard-hitting documentaries for CourtTV was that "something more." I was, and am still pretty impressed by the fact that he's used his weatherman celebrity and built a production company out of it. On the list of celebrities with meaningful production companies, Al Roker would have come in dead last on my "I bet that guy does!" list. No offense to him, but when you see someone only as a goofy weatherman, you can't imagine the person putting together documentaries. So I thought it would be cool to do the interview, and meet someone who actually used his celebrity for something more than telling Katie Couric if it's going to be sunny.

So I agreed to do the interview down in San Francisco, which lead to the update I did in April about "B-roll" and it's many evils. Consider this the bookend to that update. We arrive at the Hotel where the Roker people had a room set-up for the filming and interview. First off, beautiful hotel. My god. Just beautiful. I felt like I was trespassing and should be kicked off the property. So we get upstairs and the camera-people spend a lot of time setting things up, getting it perfect, the usual meticulous job that camera-people do. I can't imagine the poor spouses of these people, because they are absolutely detail-oriented. Everything gets set-up, and we do some B-roll footage of the website itself, myself at the computer, typical B(oring)-roll shots that have to be done.

Then we eat dinner and wait for The Roker, who was flying in from New York that same night. If his plane were to be delayed, no Roker, because I had to leave that same night. Thankfully his plane was not delayed and he arrived in order to do the interview right on time. Here is where the funny part, at least to me, comes in. The day prior, I got a call from the assistant producer who was in charge of the shoot. Confirming plans, etc, etc, and at the last, she mentions the "hat issue." See, on all my interviews, I wear my hat. I do this because frankly, I always wear my hat and there shouldn't be a problem with this when it comes to the media. I inform her that no, I will be wearing my hat and that I always wear my hat. This becomes key later, if my suspicions are correct.

During the interview, Roker asks me pretty much what I expected to be asked. Usual site background stuff, and then of course he started throwing in common "criticisms." You know, the "Suicide" angle (Which I have one hell of a response for), the "entrapment" angle, the "vigilante" angle, you know, the usual stuff. Easy to answer questions, since I've answered them so many times. The thing about the questions though, is that he was very grave, almost cautious about everything. Very, very serious. Not at all how I would expect Al Roker from his TV appearences. Then, out of the blue, perhaps the oddest experience of my life happens...

Al Roker asks me, very, very seriously, if I'm a nazi.


Yes, Al Roker thought I was a nazi
Not only had I never been asked that by a media source before, but it's Al Roker! Immediately I recognize that during their research, they must have stumbled across the article I mocked on my website, the one by the "Side of beef" in Kansas City where he tries to paint me as a nazi because the handle "AngryGerman" is a tribute to John Rabe, a great hero of China and history. It also explains, at least to me as I could be wrong, why the producer in charge of the story slipped in the thing about the hat. I keep my hair cut fairly short, and you can't tell, usually, if I have any under my hat. I think she wanted to see if I am a skinhead.

Immediately after being asked by Roker in a very serious tone if I'm a nazi, I start laughing. Because the idea of myself being a nazi is positively humorous to me. I'm not a nazi. I have no nazi sympathies. I do not believe in "white" (or any color) "power." I am not a skinhead. I like gay people. Etc, etc. So the idea that someone, let alone Al "TV's friendly weatherman" Roker, thinking I'm a nazi is hilarious to me. So I just blurt out the first thing that comes to my mind, which was of course... "well, you're Al Roker, and I like you, so how could I be a nazi?" I think that's a pretty damn good question. Then, remembering that I'm supposed to be somewhat professional, I switch into a serious answer which is that I'm not, I support Israel, blah blah blah. Still, my immediate response got a laugh out of Al, breaking the ice, which lead to a more relaxed atmosphere. He would later get me back by making faces at me while we were shooting some more B-roll together, causing me to laugh.

All in all, Al shot some tougher questions at me than I had expected, I handled them pretty well, and we got out of there to make my flight just in the nick of time. While doing the interview is great pubicity for Perverted-Justice and the goals and cause we espouse, the most memorable part of the media aspect of the trip, for me, will forever be the knowledge that TV's favorite Weatherman thought I am a nazi. Who apparently fights pedophiles online. I know, surreal to me too.

Life doesn't get any stranger than Al Roker asking if you're a Nazi.

Plug: Check out part of the interview in question as I represent PeeJ on Al Roker Productions presents Katie.com airing Wednesday night on CourtTV.

July/2004: Fast Food - As most know, I love Taco Bell. I have always loved Taco Bell. Growing up, I looked at Taco Bell as the pinnacle of eateries. Even after criss-crossing Portland, trying hundreds of restaurants... guess what?

I still consider Taco Bell the pinnacle of eateries.

Taco Bell has a variety of cheap items that are as tasty as they come. My typical Taco Bell menu consists of a Double Decker Taco, a Chicken Quesadilla, and one of those keen Beef and Potato Burritos. Truly scrumptious. Once in a while, I'll swap out an item for a Pintos and Cheese, or an Enchirito. Depends if I'm feeling experimental. However, that was not always the way of the ordering.

Back in "tha" day, before PeeJ, before AngryGerman.com, the menu ordering was far different. It was a Mexi-Nugget (since discontinued for crappy "Fiesta potatoes"), a side of nacho cheese, two double decker tacos and a Chilito.

Yes, a chilito. The Chili Cheese Burrito was the most glorious burrito ever served by Taco Bell. Ringing in at a cool buck, it was a blend of chili and cheese, simple, delightful, wonderful. It was the "main event" of the Taco Bell dish. Everything before it was leading up to the grandest burrito of them all.

So imagine my anger when I head into a Taco Bell to discover that the Chilito was no more. I do not like change when it comes to quick culinary dishes. So I said "Shit" and went to another Taco Bell in our area that still carried the burrito. They kept it for a while, but then got rid of it as well. You see, Taco Bell is giving franchisees the choice of carrying the item. Some do, some don't. None in my area do.

They should ALL carry this pinnacle of fast food burrito.

For the last couple years, I thought this was pretty much a solitary complaint. However, it is not! To try to rectify this terrible situation, a new force and cause has arisen, that of Chilicheese.org! - Link!

If you are a fan of option, or fast food, you need to sign this link. Hopefully the group behind this website can become quite large and stick up for those of us who miss our favorite menu items. You can sign their petition Here. Please sign the petition, and support this group's efforts to regain some sanity at the higher-ups at Taco Bell.

God bless you, ChiliCheese.org.

July/2004: Contact - Hello all, lately, I've been getting a lot of instant messages from people. Unfortunately, it seems that some individuals on this planet have no idea of how to instant message properly. All too often, people think of the instant message as a text "phone service." It's not. You don't use the same rules of communicate on IM that you do on the phone. Let me give you an example as we cover some of the sins you can commit on the IM.

Example #1. Thou Shalt Not Ask Dumb Questions:


What did John do wrong in the above? Obviously, the answer is the "What's up?" question. Please remove this question from your vocabulary. If I'm online, or if anyone is online, the answer is "I'm online." What would one expect me to say? "I'm here making pancakes and flipping flapjacks!" I'm on IM. I'm therefore online. That is what is up. As well, John goes on to commit the unpardonable sin of then repeating the same insipid question when I gave a curt answer. "How you doing?" is better than "What's up?" but not by much, and certainly not right after the first dumb question.

If you have no reason to contact someone other than to say "What's up", then you really should go find something to do, or stress those braincells to come up with an actual topic. However, even that can do dreadfully wrong.

Example #2. Thou Shalt Have Patience:


I hate to inform people that I am not a robot, but I'm not. Often, I have to go to the bathroom. Sometimes I go and get some Kool Aid (highly recommending the strawberry kiwi) which, I hate to inform people, is not an evil thing to do. Sometimes, I'm just playing fetch with my cat. The problem comes in when people think their topic is that important that I should respond right away. Again, this is not a phone. This is IM. It's "quicker email." If I don't respond fairly quickly, there's a good reason for it. It's not "I hate you" but "I'm busy with some other shit right now." I refuse to have to put up a "BRB BATHROOM!!!!" message. You guys don't need to know that.

I also am not responsible to TELL everyone I'm talking to at that point that I'm in the bathroom. IM'ing, when it's done right, is basically a tit-for-tat exchange. One person writes something, the other responds. Writing fifteen short sentences in a row is not what IM is about. Condense it into a paragraph and then wait. But hey, at least this person HAS a topic that COULD be interesting. When one doesn't, it's pointless and annoying.

Example #3. Thou Shalt Not Be Pointless Noob:


Yes, I am that guy with the website about the perverts. It's true. That is me. The website is called Perverted-Justice.com. I get three of these IM's a day. Look, it's great that new people hit the site and take an interest in what we do. But when that interest is nothing more than "Hey, you're that guy aren't you!", it gets a little old, quickly. About 80% of the conversations don't progress beyond that. It's just "hey, you're that guy." I suppose it's semi-akin to what celebrities go through, which makes their hatred of the common public make a lot of sense. I'm so fucking glad I'm not suffering like they do on that. "Hey, you're that guy!" Ugh.

Don't get me wrong, love the support, it just means more when people go to the forums and post their support that way. It's awfully tiring when people don't understand that the site is a group effort, a team effort. Not the effort of any one person. But perhaps worse than the "one guy" conversations are the forgetful idiots out there.

Example #4. Thou Shalt Not Be A Forgetful Idiot:


This is far worse. Here you have a person who, in a fit of apparently meaningless fancy, added my name to their list. Then, when I have the audacity to pop on, it's time to be grilled on who I am. If you don't remember who I am, then you shouldn't give a shit to find out who I am, as it wasn't worth remembering to begin with. Just move on. It's not exactly a modern mystery marvel of the world. I often look at my list and think "Who the hell is that?" Then, immediately afterward, I delete the name. If they're not important enough to remember, they're not important enough to jog my memory about.

Yet I get an IM like this once a week. They get really angry when you ask them "Does it matter if you can't remember?", as apparently, I'm supposed to be really interested in having them remember who I am, so I can talk to them. I don't know them in the first place! But worse than that sort of defensiveness is the defensiveness of someone who simply doesn't grasp that not everyone has the same IM set-up.

Example #5. Thou Shalt Change Your Font:


I use Trillian. As you can tell, it's Black and Silver with a white background. That means that if you have a screamin' hot turquoise font, I can't read it. Same with giant yellow fonts. Even pink! The color of your text isn't important. Getting mad at me because I use a superior IM client is silly. Just change the color. The best thing to do is simply stick with the default color, as it will render as white or black depending on your background. Then, you can have conversations without fear of having to do anything! Isn't that great? Sure it is.

Please take heed of those five examples, and do not annoy individuals such as myself with such obviously silly IM habits. If you follow these examples, you too can be an expert IM'er! Just follow the five step process and you'll end up in a happy land full of text and proper conversation.

July/2004: IM Convos - Saturday night is the worst night to be online. Why? Well, I explain in my desperation-bored series of conversations.













You're all gay. That is the explanation.