I'm interested in tents

October/2004: Spam - I'm really interested in tents. I didn't know I was interested in tents, but then the email told me so.

------ Original Message -----
From: richard
To: angrygerman@angrygerman.com
Sent: Wednesday, October 27, 2004 6:38 PM
Subject: Mumienschlafsack

To Whom It May Concern,

We have learned from the Internet that you are interested in tents. We have been in the tent manufacturing business for many years and are currently in the process of expanding and our customer base. We are quite excited about contacting you and the potential for establishing friendly business relations with you as well as sharing the mutual benefits.

We specialize in high quality, high performance tents offered to our cutomers at competitive prices. We are able to supply a wide variety of tents manufactured to the specifications and requirements of the customer. We would be interested in receiving more information from you so we could submit a suitable offer to you.

Feel free to view our website: www.qycamping.com

If you do not wish to receive any more information, please let us know and we will take you off our mailing list. We are awaiting your favorable response.


Richard Zheng
Marketing Director
Qyield (Xiamen) Camping Products Co., Ltd
4/F., No. 20, Huaguang Rd. Huli, Xiamen, China.
Tel: +86 592 5658478
Fax: +86 592 5744311
E-mail: richard@mainhouses.com
Web Page :www.qycamping.com

That is spam. But that is spam I like. I like this spam. I consider myself an expert on spam. I get a lot of it. I receive well over five hundred pieces of spam email a day. You know, the same shit you get, just times fifty. Cock enlargers, porn websites, home financing, prescription pills, out-of-this-country scammers and political junkmail.

But very rarely do I get email telling me that I'm interested in tents. I'm actually not interested in tents. Truly, it's an item I never have need of, since I refuse to camp. But I really like getting an email telling me that I'm interested in tents. It's unique. If I were rich, I'd probably order a tent from this Chinese guy just to reward him for giving me a chuckle at 1:15 AM. I'd even tell him so. But I'm not rich.

So perhaps, over in China, Richard Zheng will do a google search for his name. And perhaps he'll see that his spam actually brightened my night. Sure, he'll be disappointed that I'm actually not interested in tents (not to mention the fact that I have no money), but at least he's getting some free publicity. Speaking of which, let's get to that... AngryGerman.com says: "Are you interested in tents? If so, buy one from Dick Zheng. He's one helluva guy."

Know what makes my blog superior to most?

I waited until the end to go with the obvious "Buy a Dick's Tent" joke.